This little beef stems mostly from my twenty-two year old neice whom, I absolutely adore, and absolutely love spending time with, but could do without the constant interruption from her cell phone when we are together. Am I selfish to want the precious little time we have to spend with eachother to be completely devoted to just us? Mabe, but in my opinion this is a matter of:
1. common courtesy
2. making the most of the moment we're in at the moment we're in it
I know I'm not alone in this school of thought. John Mayer just wrote a current blog post vowing to turn off the texting device and stay the heck out of twitter for a week. He encourages his fans and friends to do the same and when those seven days are up to write about what they missed or didn't miss while on the tech fast. My hope is that all these techies have some real moments that otherwise would have been spoiled by their obnoxious gadgets.
Lets take a moment to examine my points more closely. First, can anyone really argue that there is ever an appropriate time other than when one is not in the company of others to answer a phone call or text? I mean, nothing says "I don't really want to be here with you" like answering a call in the middle of a face-to-face conversation with someone else. Its just plain rude. If someone I was dating (thinking back to when I was single) had their cell on while out to dinner with me, it would be the last supper they had with me. If someone's phone starts playing 'don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me' in the movie theatre you can bet the owner of that phone is getting more than a nasty look from me. And when I'm in the middle of doing my job, which would be checking patients in at the clinic, and they start talking on their phone I suddenly develop an overly loud voice. Why should visiting with family be any exception? Its not any less rude to text in the middle of a conversation with a family member or friend.
My second, and perhaps even more important point was that these young people who are constantly attached to their cell phones and text messenger gadgets are missing out on moments of their lives, or at the very least lessening the value of the moments in their lives. Everywhere you go you're subjected to teenage kids ignoring the parent they are currently with to punch out messages to friends on their little key pads. Or worse, parents who put the moment they're in with their child on hold while they answer a call from their cell phone.
I miss the good old days when telephones were anchored to the kitchen wall, not your hip. When phone calls from boyfriends were taken excitedly to the closet where a person could have a private conversation. I miss the days when leaving the house meant leaving all calls to be answered by the machine and time spent with loved ones was real quality time.
Thats my beef. I'm done.
No kidding. My little sister was at my house for a week to "help" me after the baby was born. I got so tired of hearing her cell phone beep with a new text. She completely ignored my kids(who love and adore her) all the time because she was on her cell phone or computer on facebook. It was really annoying!
ReplyDeleteAmen! and... you aren't the only one without a cell who doesn't know how to text. we have a standing rule that no one answers the phone during dinner and i tell people regularly to "let the answering machine get it - that's what it's for". i LOVE not being able to be found throughout my day. it helps me focus on the moment. life's too short to interrupt it with constand beeping!
ReplyDeleteps... i de-activated my facebook account over christmas and have layed down the law on how often i can check it now. even "nurturing friendships" was getting in the way of my relationships at home - not cool.
ReplyDeleteOkay, if I'm only allowed to text or take phone calls when I'm not in the presence of others, then I am not ever allowed to text or take phone calls. Sorry but sometimes I think it's more important to take that call from my mother who I rarely see or talk to than to continue focusing on the roommate I always live with or the aunt I see fairly often simply because we happened to be making small talk while sitting in the living room of the house I am living in when I get the call.
ReplyDeleteAnd as far as the texting thing goes, I don't text constantly. It's Christmas break and my current place of residence happens to be your mother's house, where you tend to show up fairly often. Am I supposed to drop everything I might do in my daily life and cut off all contact with my fiance just because you decide to make a 7 hour visit you would have made whether or not I was here? I don't think it's out of line to send the occasional text to my fiance while casually conversing with a family member. Now, when a plan is made to spend some time with someone and go out to eat or get together to catch up, I put my cell phone away for that time period and focus entirely on that person.
I don't feel like I am missing out on the present moment just because I receive and reply to a text from my fiance about every half hour or hour. And when I am fully absorbed into the moment and want to cut off contact from my phone and enjoy what I am currently doing, that's exactly what I do.
Natalie, you really are not as bad as a lot of younger, technology-absorbed kids, I will admit that. Usually you do use the texting with a considerable amount of appropriatness. It just so happens that some of us older people who lived our twenties without this kind of technology sometimes get annoyed with the texting beep going off all the time. I'll give you leeway since you're engaged and I remember being engaged. I only wanted to spend time with my fiance too. I just like talking to you, and kind of miss hanging out. If you could have just stayed nine forever we wouldn't be having this conversation.
ReplyDeleteThis brings up something I have wondered about. When I was young and single I used to meet new people by just talking to strangers on the street or in a store. I made a few dates that way, one of which later married me -our first mtg was in a park. My question is: How do young people now meet a new person? Every person you see on the street or in the store is in constant contact with their friends or significant other! Once a girl has a boyfriend, that guy will occupy all her time by talking to her on her cell no matter where she is... Doesn't she realize this guy is just trying to keep her from ever meeting anyone else? I'd keep ranting but I have got to go and call my wife.
ReplyDelete